Ancient Jewish Weddings (Continued)

3) Mohar

Genesis 24:50-51 "Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, 'The thing has come from the LORD; we cannot speak to you bad or good. Behold, Rebekah is before you; take her and go, and let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the LORD has spoken.'"

The family accepted the servant's offer, they could clearly see this was God's will. The servant then presented Rebekah with the mohar, all the gifts Isaac had prepared for her, samples of the wealth he would provide for her as her husband. This is so much like the Holy Spirit in your life today, giving you spiritual gifts according to His grace.

4) Cup of Acceptance

Genesis 24:54a "And he and the men who were with him ate and drank, and they spent the night there."

Once the terms of the ketuvah had been specified and the father of the bride had agreed to them, betrothals were sealed with a traditional "cup of acceptance" from which both parties drank; the covenant was sealed, and the couple was considered to be betrothed. Think about how God gives us His Holy Spirit as a seal for that day when we will be joined to Him forever in heaven.

The betrothal period typically lasted one full year, beginning with the sealing of the covenant and ending with the wedding ceremony. During that time the groom would prepare their new home, which meant adding on to his father's home or building a new home on the family property. He would have stocked the bridal chamber with seven days' worth of provisions so they could spend a week together inside as their honeymoon.

Think of Jesus saying, "I go to prepare a place for you; in My Father's house are many mansions." As fast and as hard as he worked, though, it was the groom's father who made the final decision as to when the bridal chamber and new home were ready, and gave permission for his son to go marry his bride. Think of Jesus telling His disciples that He would return for them to bring them back to Him, but only the Father knew the day and the hour.

For the bride this time was for purification and preparation for the wedding feast. She would wear a veil whenever she stepped out of her house to show that she was set apart for marriage to a particular man -- she was "spoken for," no longer available because she had been bought with a price.

In Hebrew, she would be called a "me `kudeshet," meaning one who is "sanctified, dedicated to another, set apart and consecrated to her bridegroom" just as every believer is being sanctified by the Holy Spirit, being transformed by the renewing of your minds, one day to be glorified with Christ (and this is where we are in the marriage process with the Lord Jesus Christ. We are certainly His, but the wedding itself is yet to come).

[C] Nissuin: The wedding (nissuin) was the next stage of the marriage process. It was always a surprise for the bride, she never knew when the groom was going to come. Finally, the groom's father would approve all the preparations his son had made and would release him to go get his bride. A great processional would be made, to the bride's home. Typically, this processional would happen at night. The groomsmen and other attendants would carry large torches through the streets to illuminate their path, with lots of noise, horns blowing and fanfare.

The bride and her attendants would be able to hear the approaching party giving her a few minutes to get ready. (This is where the parable of the ten virgins takes place, in Matthew 25). In the final minutes of readiness, the bride was to put on her veil. The bridal veil was a symbol of authority. By placing the veil on her head she was demonstrating to herself and the whole world that she was coming under her husband's authority.

Genesis 24:64-65 "And Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she dismounted from the camel and said to the servant, 'Who is that man, walking in the field to meet us?' The servant said, 'It is my master.' So she took her veil and covered herself."

For Rebekah the surprise was that her betrothal would last only one night, but the processional would last nearly two months across 600 miles of desert.

Ancient wedding ceremonies were actually very simple. Before witnesses the bride accepted gifts from her groom, and the groom spoke a few words of acceptance and consecration to his bride. During the wedding ceremony the bride's veil was placed on her husband's shoulder. This signified the bride yielding to her husband's authority. After this the husband drew his wife into the bridal chamber for seven days of celebration.

[D] Fourth part of marriage: The joyful celebration would last one week. As the happy couple stayed in their marriage chamber, being served by their attendants, the guests would partake of a week-long feast. Isaac loved Rebekah from the beginning, and their marriage comforted and strengthened him.

Think of the wedding feast described in Revelation.....

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Ancient Jewish Weddings (And What That Has To Do With Christ)

Talking about eschatology is fun, I like it, it's all conjecture and all that really matters is that we know He's coming back, and He's coming back for us.

You all know the analogy of the onion: it's comprised of many layers, as you peel off the outer layer, here is another underneath. That's what this story is like.

A) There are four main characters: Abraham, his chief servant, Isaac and Rebekah.

B) There is the story of an ancient marriage, which had four main parts: The arrangements, which were made by the fathers; the year-long betrothal, which the bride and groom entered into if they each freely agreed to the marriage; the wedding ceremony, which was very short; and the celebration, which was a week long.

C) Theologians have long associated this story with God's redemption of believers: Abraham standing for God the Father sending his unnamed servant into the far country to take a bride for his son, though she doesn't yet know she has been chosen; the servant is like the Holy Spirit, to invite her to come, to woo and win her, bringing her back to the Father's house; Isaac is like Jesus, the sacrificial lamb Who is resurrected, ready to receive and claim His beloved for Himself; Rebekah is like the believer who chooses to leave her old life and enter, by faith, into communion with the Lord

For Abraham, part of imparting his God-given responsibility was finding a godly wife who would uphold godly principles instead of leading her family into idolatry and godless ways.

Genesis 24:24 "And Abraham said to his servant, the oldest of his household, who had charge of all that he had, 'Put your hand under my thigh, that I may make you swear by the LORD, the God of heaven and God of the earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell, but will go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac.'"

It was the custom at that time for the parents to arrange for the marriage of their children, as is still the custom in some eastern and near-eastern nations today. Most theologians believe the servant in this story was Eliezer, and possibly one of the two servants who had accompanied Abraham and Isaac to Mt. Moriah. He would have had a deep understanding of how important this commission was to Abraham.

Putting the hand under the thigh as an oath was an oriental custom recognizing that the loins were the source of life. Multiplying his seed to be a blessing to the whole earth was one of God's unconditional promises to Abraham. For the servant, it was a representation of being bound in the very deepest part of his life. This was a solemn vow concerning the covenant promises of God.

Abraham had begun the marriage process with what was called
[A] The shiddukin: or "the arrangement," where the father would choose the prospective mate for his child. Most often this process began early in the child's life. Often neither person knew who their father was making arrangements with until the time to agree had arrived. In the same way God the Father loved and foreknew from before the creation of the world those who would be redeemed to eternal life through union with Christ. Think of all the places in scripture where God says He has chosen us since before time.

The Biblical principle in this case is that a believer is not to marry someone who has not committed their life to the Lord Jesus Christ. There can be no fellowship of light with darkness, no harmony, no unity. Abraham refused to even entertain the idea, even though finding a godly wife was going to mean lots of risk, dangers and total reliance on God to bring her safely back to Isaac.

Genesis 24:22 "When the camels had finished drinking, the man took a gold ring weighing a half shekel,[a] and two bracelets for her arms weighing ten gold shekels..."

He was all ready to offer betrothal gifts to this young woman once she answered his critical question

Genesis 24:23-24 "...and said, 'Please tell me whose daughter you are. Is there room in your father’s house for us to spend the night?' She said to him, 'I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, whom she bore to Nahor.'"

Rebekah invited the servant to their home, assuring him of their warm and capable hospitality for his entire caravan.

Genesis 24:26-27 "The man bowed his head and worshiped the LORD and said, 'Blessed be the LORD, the God of my master Abraham, who has not forsaken his steadfast love and his faithfulness toward my master. As for me, the LORD has led me in the way to the house of my master’s kinsmen.'"

[B] Eyrusin: And here began the second stage of the marriage, the betrothal. From verse 22, rings were used as currency in the Middle East before there were coins, and were a sign of a person's wealth. The giving of a betrothal ring was first practiced in ancient times when the groom purchased his bride. The size of the ring showed the wealth of the family.

The ring itself was a symbol of unending love, since the ring has no beginning and no end. This is reminiscent of the Holy Spirit quickening in a believer's heart the call to belief, presenting the pure gold of the gospel, the unending love of God and of eternal life. Think about how the Bible talks about Jesus purchasing us with something far more valuable than even gold – His own life. Rebekah accepted these gifts as the servant worshiped God for the success of his mission.

1) Kinyan

Genesis 24:28-31a "Then the young woman ran and told her mother’s household about these things. Rebekah had a brother whose name was Laban. Laban ran out toward the man, to the spring. As soon as he saw the ring and the bracelets on his sister’s arms, and heard the words of Rebekah his sister, 'Thus the man spoke to me,' he went to the man. And behold, he was standing by the camels at the spring. He said, 'Come in, O blessed of the LORD.'"

A lawful marriage required an act of kinyan: that the bride be given -- and that she accept -- something of nominal value from the groom. Laban understood that Rebekah had just accepted, however tacitly, a proposal from the servant, so he ran out to invite him into their home to wash his feet, be fed and hopefully describe a little more fully what he proposed, while the camels and the rest of his company were taken care of. In the east you never talk business until after you've eaten.

So it was very unusual for the servant to refuse food until he had delivered the story of his mission. He left nothing out, but was forthright and candid. He began by talking about the glories of Abraham, telling about all his wealth, flocks, herds, silver and gold, servants, camels and donkeys.

Genesis 24:35 "'The LORD has greatly blessed my master, and he has become great. He has given him flocks and herds, silver and gold, male servants and female servants, camels and donkeys.'"

Why? Verse 36 "To him he has given all he has." Because this would be the inheritance of Isaac, Rebekah's future husband.

2) Ketuvah At the time of betrothal, a ketuvah, a written notice of intentions, would be presented to the bride and her father by the groom and his father. This ketuvah clearly defined the agreed upon conditions of the covenant being entered. Specifically it detailed the bride price and the other conditions of the marriage.

The ketuvah was much more than the marriage license we acquire today to authorize our legal unions. This contract was initiated by the groom obligating him to his bride. The legal document detailed the groom’s responsibilities to his wife including his promise to serve, support and sustain his bride and denying himself for her good. In a culture that predominately viewed women as property, the document accompanied a monetary obligation in the case of a divorce as well. The ketuvah elevated the woman to a valued companion in life emphasizing the protection of the wife and her welfare in the Jewish community.

Today the contracts are still written in Aramaic and elaborately decorated on high quality parchment. The ketuvah is signed by the groom and two witnesses and preserved by the bride. Tradition held that the bride remained in her father’s house for one year until the wedding, but they were considered man and wife at the signing of the contract. The bride had no conditions or obligations in the contract, but received and held her husband’s commitment as a gift. She only need remain pure until the designated marriage feast at which time the groom would arrive to gather his bride to himself.

The bride at this point had a choice to make. She could accept the ketuvah, or she could walk away. The servant presented his case:

Genesis 24:49 "'Now then, if you are going to show steadfast love and faithfulness to my master, tell me; and if not, tell me, that I may turn to the right hand or to the left.'"

Here again is that swirl of currents, God's sovereign will and humankind's genuine free will: God had chosen Rebekah for Isaac, and yet Rebekah was also presented with a choice to make.

As the servant related his story, Rebekah was given an opportunity to observe him closely: a man of integrity, a man of faith and serious intent, his words could be trusted and God was blessing him with clear guidance and success. In the same way the Bible states that once you and I are presented with the Gospel, we have a choice to make: to accept Jesus' offer of salvation from the penalty of sin, to be joined with Him in eternal life, love and be loved by Him forever in heaven, or to reject Him and remain under God's wrath over sin. The Holy Spirit is at work, enlivening your heart to the winsomeness of Christ, and at the same time you are given the choice to make.

More next week.......

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